1. Classic sautéed cabbage

What you need: Half a cabbage, 1 onion, 2 tablespoons of oil, salt, and black pepper

This is your baseline. The recipe that separates those who can cook from those who just microwave everything.

Slice the cabbage thinly. Chop your onion. Heat oil in a sufuria, throw in the onions until they soften, then add the cabbage. Stir it around. Add salt and pepper. Let it cook for about 7 minutes. You want it soft but not swimming in sadness.

The upgrade: If you have garlic or soy sauce hiding somewhere, add a bit. Suddenly, your Ksh 50 cabbage is tasting like it has a degree.

Serve with: Ugali, rice, or just eat it straight from the pot while standing. No judgment here.

2. Cabbage and eggs (When you need protein but are broke)

What you need: Quarter cabbage, 2-3 eggs, 1 onion, oil, salt, pepper

This is the recipe that makes you feel like you are still winning at life.

Same start as before: onions in hot oil. Add your sliced cabbage, let it soften for about 5 minutes. Then crack in your eggs directly on top. Scramble everything together like you’re making a confused omelette. Season properly. This is not the time to be shy with salt.

The eggs stretch the meal, add protein, and somehow make everything feel more complete. Eat with chapati or bread. If January is really testing you, just dig in with a spoon.

Pro tip: This works for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Cabbage doesn’t judge your meal timing.

3. Zero-effort coleslaw (When cooking feels like cardio)

What you need: Half a cabbage, 1 carrot, mayonnaise, lemon or vinegar, salt, pepper

Some days, even lighting the gas feels like too much work. This is for those days.

Shred your cabbage thinly. Grate the carrot if you have one (if not, skip it! We are not here to stress). Mix everything in a bowl. Add three big spoons of mayonnaise, squeeze in some lemon or splash some vinegar, add salt and pepper. Stir. Done.

This sits next to literally anything: rice, chips, bread, even those sad leftovers in your fridge, and makes the meal feel fresh and intentional.

Reality check: Buy the small mayonnaise sachet if money is tight. Works the same.

4. Coconut cabbage (Fake it till you make it)

What you need: Half a cabbage, 1 onion, 200 ml coconut milk (small packet), curry powder, oil, salt

This is the recipe that makes your neighbors think you are doing okay financially.

Fry your onions, add cabbage, and let it start softening. Then pour in that coconut milk. Add a teaspoon of curry powder and salt. Let it simmer for about 10 minutes. The kitchen starts smelling glorious again.

Serve with rice. Eat slowly. Let people wonder how you are eating this well in January.

Money-saving truth: The small coconut milk packet is enough. You are not making a feast, just making January bearable.

5. Raw cabbage salad (The “I’m detoxing” move)

What you need: Quarter cabbage, 1 tomato, half an onion, lemon, salt

After all those December chapos and nyama, sometimes your body just needs something raw and crunchy.

Shred the cabbage. Chop the tomato and onion into small pieces. Mix everything. Squeeze lemon all over it. Add salt. Mix again. Eat while telling yourself you are cleansing your system, and February will be better.

Is it really detox? Probably not. Does it make you feel better about your life choices? Absolutely.

Njaanuary reality

Cabbage in January isn’t punishment. It’s strategy. While others are out here eating sadness with a side of stress, you are eating actual meals that cost less and taste better.

The cabbage vendor at the market knows what’s up. That knowing smile? That’s respect. Because January is temporary, but knowing how to cook cheap food properly is a life skill.

So slice that cabbage with confidence. Njaanuary ends eventually!